Here’s a wee story. This one happened to occur in a pottery class.

There is a local storefront that has a display of hand built and thrown pottery tempting people to wander in to see and touch. Once inside you notice that just behind the display is a working studio with people hunched over a lump of clay creating bowls and cups and other treasures.

There is something primal about clay. Just getting your hands into the mud and water allows you to go to another place that takes you away from the clutter of your mind. Indeed you need to be able to let go and center yourself before you can hope to center clay on the potter’s wheel.

A friend was telling me about seeing this scenario and signing up for classes hoping to partake in this engrossing creative environment. Unfortunately someone with a preference for Extraversion who also happened to be asleep to her behaviour and its impact on others also signed up. She was loud and chatty. She simply saw silence as a void to be filled and kept a loud stream of noise going throughout the class.

Now it is easy to see how Extraverts can be disruptive. I am sure that many polite people in the class wanted to scream “BE QUIET!” However any behaviour taken to the extreme or inappropriate to the circumstances can have a negative impact on others. I have also met people who complain about living with those who don’t talk, those who over-analyze, those who are impulsive and on it goes.

We create our own reality.

I have heard that phrase many times from teachers, and have embraced the idea behind these words. What I pay attention to becomes what is real for me. I suppose the trick is to recognize the implications of my filtering system and to recognize that there is so much to pay attention to that multiple realities are possible and quite possibly equally valid to my own.

Developing the capacity to observe ourselves and increase our awareness of the context in which we are operating – well what can I say – it is the ideal answer. Now the trick is to get everyone else to buy in so that we can all make our pots in a an environment where centering is easy.

Category: Communication
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One Response to “Shhh – I’m Trying to Get Centered”

Pam Hollister January 21, 2011

I like the way you worded the Extravert’s behavior – “a preference for Extraversion who also happened to be asleep to her behavior.” As an Introvert, I’ve been in groups where there are a few Extraverts that were “asleep” to their behavior.

And, we Introverts can sometimes be too quiet. It’s important to be aware of others that we’re in community with. When I’m in groups, I try to not be too quiet and internal. It’s important to assist the Extraverts being comfortable.

One thing for sure, before I became fully aware of personality type, I was just plain stupid regarding other’s needs. Understanding type assists me in helping others be more comfortable.