Painted HeartI have been thinking a lot about relationships and what enhances and challenges the way two people relate. While I think that there are good reasons to be intentional about gaining self knowledge and improving communication, there is a home truth that keeps running through my brain. My aunt once challenged me about the term “relationships”.

She said “What’s important is LOVE. If you love someone you don’t need to talk about your ‘relationship’.” Aunt Tish was married over 60 years to three different men. Uncle Percy was young love and raising children and they remained a family first even after the divorce – an intelligent thoughtful divorce. Uncle Art was just LOVE personified and when he died Aunt Tish was just past 75 years of age.

Then Peter, a real Renaissance man, who had become a great friend over several years – sharing an interest in Tish’s charitable work, her love of books and the world of finance. Peter moved seamlessly from great friend to husband number three. Peter was a younger man and I wondered about their story. It became clear during a visit when I noticed how they finished each others sentences. At one point I showed my aunt my art portfolio. She went through each image and pointed out six favourites. Later on when Peter was browsing through he stopped on the same six paintings making very similar comments. It was uncanny.

Age was not an issue. These two were like Frick and Frack, two peas in a pod, soul-mates. They genuinely cared for each other in a way that did not need analysis. They loved each other. They liked each other. They had fun and respect and devotion. If you are lucky enough to love someone and have someone love you, cherish that. That’s what counts in family, best friends and mates.

I still reserve the right to use the word “relationship” when referring to business partners and colleagues. Then a little knowledge about personality types may just save the day.

Category: Relationships
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